Final Destination 5
Blu-ray | DVD
DIRECTED BY: Steven Quale
WRITTEN BY: Eric Heisserer
STARRING: Nicholas D’Agosto, Emma Bell, Miles Fisher, Arlen Escarpeta, David Koechner, Tony Todd, Courtney B. Vance, P.J. Byrne, Ellen Wroe, Jacqueline MacInnes-Wood
Warner Brothers
RELEASE DATE: December 27, 2011

The last time we had a brush with death was in 2010’s The Final Destination. As it turned out, that installment in the horror movie franchise was by far the worst of them all with horrible acting, nonsensical situations, soap opera-level acting, and just an all-around unlikable final product. And that’s coming from someone who very much enjoyed the previous installments in the series for what they are: gruesomely fun guilty pleasures.

Watching AMC’s The Walking Dead is an all-consuming experience for me. I can’t shut up about it for days after, and its really awkward when people start tripping over my dropped jaw. In the interest of my sanity, I decided to transcribe my thoughts about each episode as they happen, rather than let them build up and bubble over into one giant “SQUEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!” that can be heard several towns over.

For Season 2, Episode 1: What Lies Ahead, I’ve compiled a running commentary here, complete with approximate minute marks for reference.

Before you proceed, I must say that there are SPOILERS ahead, so if you haven’t seen this episode yet (SHAME!), go watch it now! Right now. I’ll wait. Ok no, I won’t, so here goes…