All Machine, No Man: Thoughts On The First ‘RoboCop’ Remake Trailer

On Thursday, the first trailer for next February’s RoboCop reboot/remake was released. I watched it twice – the first time squinting and achingly readjusting my eyesight as a YouTube embed played on my trading card-sized cell phone screen; the second time in high-definition on my laptop. Viewing it initially with lackluster screen resolution and barely passable sound quality, I felt that I couldn’t judge the content fairly, since I was only able to process a flurry of rapid-fire images. The most visually appalling that I could recall were Samuel L. Jackson‘s hairpiece and some the sight of the iconic cyborg police officer of a crime-ridden Detroit re-envisioned (and I use that term so loosely it would not stick even if I used applied super glue and hammered nails into it, crucifixion style) as the stillborn love child of Mike Baron and Steve Rude’s sci-fi comic book superhero Nexus and one of those Jaeger pilot suits from Pacific Rim.

So I waited until the second time when I could finally hear and see everything the trailer had to offer to decide for myself if this 2:20 spot that us fans of the original RoboCop had been waiting for with the kind of anticipation that can reduce your stomach lining to beef jerky was a positive sign of things to come. As it turns out, I shouldn’t have bothered with the second viewing because I hadn’t really missed anything on my initial viewing of the trailer. No matter what size you watch it on, be it Google Glass or IMAX, the trailer for the rebooted RoboCop represents everything the bad buzz that has been gathering and festering for months like locusts feasting on the decaying remains of Bubonic plague victims was priming us for: ugly, bland, humorless, monotonous, and derivative of not only the original RoboCop movies, but of every jacked-up and failed superhero movie ever made by a major studio.

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First Look: Joel Kinnaman On Set As RoboCop!
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Thanks to our friends at ComingSoon.net, the film enthusiast community has their first look at Joel Kinnaman (The Killing) in the new RoboCop suit! Director Jose Padilha‘s remake of RoboCop began filming today in Toronto, where Kinnaman was spotted in costume. Check out the photos here below.

Recently, a draft of the screenplay by Josh Zetumer and Nick Schenk was leaked onto the Internet, which revealed that there would be numerous versions of RoboCop as OmniCorp refined their design, so while I doubt this will be the only RoboCop suit you see Kinnaman in; I think this is probably the final, combat-ready design.

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Gary Oldman Joins ‘RoboCop’ Remake
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You’ve seen him play tag-team partner to Batman and Harry Potter, now Gary Oldman will help RoboCop kick ass in Old Detroit.

According to The Hollywood Reporter, Oldman has joined the cast of Jose Padilha‘s RoboCop remake, which stars Joel Kinnaman (The Killing) as Officer Alex J. Murphy, a man resurrected and reborn as a cyborg police officer.

THR says that Oldman will play Norton, “the scientist who creates RoboCop and finds himself torn between the ideals of the machine trying to rediscover its humanity and the callous needs of a corporation.”

In my recent feature RoboCop: Electric Dreams and Cybernetic Wishes, I referenced an April report from The Tracking Board that first mentioned the character of Norton. At the time, Edward Norton was in talks for the role.

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MGM Is Back With ‘RoboCop,’ ‘Poltergeist’ & ‘Mr. Mom’ Remakes
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And round ‘n’ round we go!

Remakes of movies like RoboCop and Poltergeist have been around for quite a while now, but appeared to be casualties of the many financial complications faced by MGM recently. Since then, the studio has figured some things out, made a couple moves, and saved their two top properties in The Hobbit and James Bond 23.

Next up for MGM was getting a trio of remakes of theirs back into motion. It’s being reported that thought-to-be-deceased remakes of the previously mentioned RoboCop and Poltergeist, as well as a remake of Mr. Mom are said to be back on and currently in motion.

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‘Underworld’ Director Len Wiseman To Deliver ‘Total Recall’ Remake
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Columbia Pictures presidents Doug Belgrad and Matt Tolmach have announced that Underworld director Len Wiseman is in final negotiations to direct their remake of the 1990 Paul Verhoeven science fiction favorite, Total Recall. Though still at a late negotiation stage, a press release was put out by the studio (via /Film) to make the announcement, meaning this is a done deal.

Wiseman is best known as the director of Underworld and Underworld: Evolution. He also directed Live Free or Die Hard and is expected to return to helm Underworld 4. He was at one time attached to bring us the feature adaptation of hit video game Gears of War, but budgetary restrictions have that project facing an uncertain future.

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