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It Came From The Interwebs: Hungry Hungry Hippos, Zombie LEGOs, Pie Hard
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It Came From The Interwebs!

With a jetpack fueled by insomnia and an easily amused mind, It Came From the Interwebs scours and sifts through everything that has ever appeared on the internet (more or less) to find a few things that you should know about every week. These things come from the interwebs, hence the clever name.

This Week: LEGOs, Pie, Fresh Prince memories, and roller skating away from Hepatitis.

1. Screw You LEGO

Lego Shaun

Pixel Fox and Yatkuu built this Shaun of the Dead LEGO playset prototype and managed to get enough signatures for LEGO to consider manufacturing it (10,000). That’s right, it only takes 10,000 signatures for LEGO to consider making a playset, but if your idea box just started sparking and you’re conjuring ideas like a Total Recall LEGO prototype, extinguish that ample flame plebeian! No 3-titted LEGO-lady for you, no 3-titted LEGO-lady for anyone! And no Shaun of the Dead playset either. LEGO passed, stating that the source film “contains content that is not appropriate for our core target audience of children ages 6-11.”

As Geekologie points out, 6-11 year olds aren’t buying LEGOs, their parents are and maybe they want to feel like their buying something more than a choking hazard and their child’s love — they want some educational bang for their buck, and nothing is more educational and entertaining (entertational… edutaining) than learning about zombies.

2. Holy Rollers

Pop quiz hotshot, what does every intervention need to succeed? Lame-o es que if you answered, “a commitment to overcoming the challenges of addiction.” What you need is some lasers and disco.

The people at Roller Kingdom in Reno, Nevada believe the pathway to a sober and fulfilling life is best navigated on wheels. It’s a roller rink on a mission from the lawd. Check out the video above to see their commercial. It’s chock-full of kids eschewing the sweet, sweet nectar of the co-ca-een for the f-u-n of staph-filled rented roller skates and head wound -inducing wood floors.

One last thing, is that really the owner of Roller Kingdom playing a van driving, candy-offering pedo-potential in the commercial before coming back later to boast about how his establishment keeps kids off the street? Are they off the street because they’re in his van?! Now that I pointed that out, I’m sure the rink will probably shut down and become a hangout for ravers and meth-heads. Oh irony, you cruel bitch.

Side-Bar: The commercial is real, but it was also produced by noted interweb provocateurs Rhett and Link, so it’s a little fake also.

3. Hippos

Hippo Movie

This is a brilliant but FAKE poster for a FAKE Michael Bay movie that will never get made. How do I know that it’ll never get made? The tagline: “The battle for Earth begins in Africa.” No way people would put down money to see this — if there is one thing that Americans have demonstrated, it’s that they don’t pay attention to anything that happens in Africa.

4. Pie Hard

Pie Hard

[Source: DamnThatsWhack]

5. Master of the Ladies

Master of the Ladies

Designed by Mick Minogue, this “Old Spice Guy” action figure will be on display at the upcoming “Meme” show at the 1988 Gallery in LA.

[Source: DamnThatsWhack]

6. The Art of Movement — The Carlton Dance

Nobody wanted to help Alfonso Ribeiro build the world’s largest ride-able train set or do worldwide reading from the the “Crush Groove” episode of In the House, so instead he did a flash-mob and broke a record by leading the world largest synchronized dance party whilst doing the “Carlton Dance.” Check it out and be well, for that is all we have this week — personally I think last week’s column was better, but on the plus side, I know I was more offensive. Peace, Love, and Sarcasm ya’ll.

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