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Spoiler Talk: Iron Man 2
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Guy_Jen   |  
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Iron Man 2Well pretty much everyone across the world has been anticipating this movie since Iron Man came out in 2008. I was definitely among that group and had very high expectations for Iron Man. In short I did enjoy myself and had fun watching it but it definitely did not live up to my extremely high expectations. I really wish it had and I also really wish it didn’t have so much set up for other movies in it and was just what it should have been, a sequel to a really great superhero movie.

All that aside we are here to have fun so I won’t harp on all the things I didn’t like about the movie. What I loved about both Iron Man and Iron Man 2 is the graphics and they definitely hold up in this go around just as much as the first one. I still love Robert Downey Jr. as Tony Stark and I pretty much love Mickey Rourke and Sam Rockwell in anything, even though Rourke was underused and Rockwell was just an annoying less-successful copy of Tony Stark. I also really love the addition of scenes with Clark Gregg, the mysterious agent of S.H.I.E.L.D., and new characterization of Howard Stark, played by a new favorite of mine John Slattery.

I still am a little shaky on the casting choice for Black Widow because I don’t buy Scarlett Johansson being as badass as Black Widow should be. Might as well have just cast Megan Fox in my opinion. I also didn’t necessarily agree with re-casting James Rhodes with Don Cheadle and didn’t see why it was a requirement since no one can seem to give a straight answer as to why it was done. I still like Don Cheadle as Rhodey but I don’t think it was the best for the movie. I also wasn’t sure why Jon Favreau decided to give himself a more prevalent role.

While this isn’t the best made movie or even the most fun I have had in the theater this year, I do suggest going to watch it just for a fun romp and a few great fight scenes. I enjoyed the movie overall and hope that if and when there is a third, that it is back up to par with the first.

Anyway, enough of the boring stuff, let’s get on with the SPOILER TALK! The following is my spoiler minefield for Iron Man 2 so step through it and don’t forget to drop a few mines of your own at the end of the post in our comments section.

SPOILERS

WARNING: If you have not seen Iron Man 2, do NOT read any further. There will be SPOILERS below.

-First off I want to know why Ivan Vanko cries like he is having a seizure while practicing his best impression of a Lex Luthor laugh. Second off what is with the oral fixation guy? I mean seriously how much junk could you have in your teeth that you could need a toothpick for that long.

-Ok this really needs to be my living room set up, blasting Shoot to Thrill by AC/DC and dancing models in Iron Lady Armor Bikinis. Seriously, can anyone hook that up for me?

-Holy crap Tony are you serious? I mean you are still a pompous ass? I mean didn’t you learn anything in Iron Man?

-Wait a second did anyone notice that we just totally got gypped on one of the best scenes of the entire trailer. “You complete me!”

-Stop the presses Olivia Munn cameo. WHO CARES! That really didn’t need to be such a big deal people!

-Okay there was a ton of product placement throughout this movie but I will just knock as much as I can remember right now because it was the first I noticed. C-Span, MSNBC, and pretty much every other news channel as well as some sort of handheld device that looks a lot like an Apple iPad.

-Is anyone else freaked out by the fact that the Stark Expo is apparently held for an entire year? Is that feasible? I mean seriously do people quit their jobs just to go to this thing?

-Ok now to whatever this hearing is and listening to Justin HAMMER talk about how the armor as a SWORD and a SHIELD, comic reference anyone? Second News flash everyone Rhodey got plastic surgery and shrunk like 6-8 inches. Nobody noticed? Holy crap, a government official can say F&@% you and nobody cares?

-Who the friggen heck drew that Iron Man portrait cause it is wicked awesome!!! Oh yeah and as gorgeous as that photo is it comes nowhere near as close to the beauty of Pepper Potts, Gwyneth Paltrow. Oh yeah and is it seriously possible to just hand over your CEO position to your personal assistant? I mean wouldn’t the board have something to say about that or a vote or something?

-Jeez I know I am going to be annoyed by Happy for the rest of the movie… Seriously Favro aren’t you supposed to be directing?

-Now we get introduced to Natalie Rushman, second place to Pepper Potts. Of course we get some stupid lingerie photo of her. I mean how is Tony Stark buying into this cover story? Seriously?

-Sweet f-ing reveal of Whiplash and his technology. Wait is anyone starting to mistake this movie for Transformers? I mean with the slo-mo and explosions I am forgetting which one I am watching.

-Maybe I am alone in this but I wish they hadn’t revealed the briefcase armor in the trailer at this point. I mean that was one of the best ways of the armor being placed in the whole movie and we already know what it looks like from the trailer over and over again.

-What a wonderful prison system. Is that the French? I mean come on seriously how can it be that easy to break someone out of prison and fake their death in the process?

-It is Stark’s birthday party and he is having this huge party but everyone around looks like they are 18 year olds. I mean did he break into a prom for his birthday or are we supposed to buy that he would only have 17 and 18 year old kids there?

-Ok how does Rhodey even know how to get the suit on? With the technology as advanced as it is why would it even turn on if it sensed another body in it? Even if you believe all that let’s think about how hard it was for Stark to learn to drive the suits yet it takes Rhodey like five seconds.

-Seeing Nick Fury in a cafe is very reminiscent of Pulp Fiction. Now I want to watch that movie.

-Ivan seriously you need to stop harping on your bird and tooth picks. You are seriously starting to creep me and probably everyone else out.

-That is awesome! Captain America’s Shield! Not only do we get to see it but we also get to see that Playskool helped with the design!

-Wait so you’re telling me that this impossible element is possible to make and Stark can make it in a half an hour? Oh yeah and that beam that cut through everything doesn’t effect the machine or the device itself and that the device can heal the big cut through the metal in seconds?

-Wait so we watch a movie with Whiplash as a main character and the big payoff fight only adds up to 2 minutes in a suit that doesn’t even make sense? How is he whipping those with all that metal in the way and why is everyone’s helmet always have to be up? How are they not getting a concussion every five seconds?

-The biggest spoiler of the whole movie. Playskool Hammer after the credits. Why can everything else look halfway decent but the Captain America Shield and Mjolnir look so fake? Holy crap.

Your turn… What do you think of Iron Man 2? Was it better than the original? How does it compare to the other comic book movies of the year? How does it compare to the movies of 2010? Is it a good start to the summer movie season?

9 Comments »

  1. Johansson is a hundred times classier than Fox. Don’t even compare them, even if they were both eye candy in Michael Bay films.

    Cheadle was cast because Terrence Howard was an apparent d-bag and wanted more money, even though he got paid more than Downey, Jr. in the first film. It was not Marvel’s fault there they did what they could, although I felt Cheadle’s portrayal of Rhodes was a bit stale.

    As for the other heroes’ weapons: PlaySkool? Really? Stretching it there. They were on the screen for mere seconds and were just to get people excited. The hammer was being seen in a desert. Everything looks like crap in a desert.

    I do agree with you that the pocket armor sequence should of been left out of the trailer.

    Comment by Slipstream — May 11, 2010 @ 11:13 am

  2. Firstly I agree 100% with Slipstream. Scarlett Johansson was way better than Megan Fox. Megan Fox is why Jonah Hex doesn’t seem like a must see to me.(If she could just stand there without talking it might work) I thought Rourke try a little too hard, but liked Don Cheadle better than Terrance Howard. Rhody was more a conscience to Tony than a buddy. The dynamic between them was better in this movie. Rhody didn’t let stark walk all over him like in the first movie. (Howard had a better look and build for the role, but that was about it)

    A couple things that were like “really?”:The huge year long convention, the prison break, Rhody can pilot the Mark II in like in no time, creating an element with a particle accelerator that small in like 10 min, the over-the_top computer grid in the “lab” (we get it, he can interact with all his designs, it was neat the first time). The biggest “really?” or “SERIOUSLY!?” was toward the end. If you see an evil robot that was wreaking havoc suddenly start beeping and blinking red your not going to stand there and watch it like an idiot forever. Your gonna run as far as you can to get away from it before it explodes.

    Some awesome moments: Tony addressing the general in D.C. Tony is such an ass.The Mark V was cool(the briefcase suit) and Whiplash getting run into over and over. Drunk Iron Man WTF!LMAO(great role model) Iron-man fighting War-Machine the first time to Robot Rock by Daft Punk. Nick Fury giving Tony crap about his “disease”. Hammer Con. Turns out Justin Hammer is just as big a tool as Tony Stark.The super lasers of death. The “ex-wife” epic fail. The medal presentation, “see how annoying a little prick can be.” The Mjolnir reveal. (It didn’t look that bad)

    Some good stuff, some bad stuff, all action movie goodness.

    Comment by Rich — May 11, 2010 @ 1:02 pm

  3. Johansson Is in no way a good fit for Black Widow and both of you vehemently defending her proves my point. All you said was she is better than Megan Fox! That isn’t really the best endorsement for anyone really. And yes slipstream the fact that these weapons were only shown for mere seconds means it should have been even easier to make them realistic because it would cost less then showing it for longer. I mean come on let’s be realistic, how much money was spent on the armor to make it look good yet we can’t get a decent looking shield or hammer? Come on! The shield was my bigger complaint of the two but when you have seen the hammer scene enough times you start to notice the details. And lastly Terrence Howard asked for more money, so what! So did everyone else! And you seriously think Don Cheadle didn’t get a butt load of money? I honestly don’t think that in a million years Howard got paid more than Downey Jr. if they didn’t want Howard because he was a jerk on set then they should have said that and yes it is their fault for not handling it better. Cheadle may be a better Rhodey but I have never seen Cheadle look more awkward then when he first steps into the suit of armor. Anyways I am glad you guys decided to comment and really I was thinking the same thing when Pepper was staring at the blinking robot at the end. I mean could it look more like a bomb? Thanks for all the insightful thoughts and I hope you guys find something else to disagree with in my comment because it is always fun to discuss this stuff.

    Comment by Guy_Jen — May 11, 2010 @ 4:04 pm

  4. Wow Guy, QQ more? The reason Scarlett was a better fit was because she has something called acting ability. Seriously, watch Matchpoint, Scoop, or Lost in Translation. I don’t care if you buy her as a badass since you obviously have something against her. The Captain America shield was a “mock-up” since it’s been revealed on four sites that Tony Stark’s father will appear in the Captain America movie as one of the people that help to mold the Captain America image. Another thing, Justin HAMMER talking about SWORD and SHIELD is something you are reading into, it’s not a comic reference to the new lame storylines. Lastly, nobody gives two shits and a giggle why Terrance Howard was replaced. Money, jerkwad attitude, panty-raided Paltrow’s trailer, whatever. Cheadle is a far superior actor, get over it. I’m not saying there weren’t some things wrong with the movie, but it’s a fantastic way to kick off the summer blockbusters.
    PS- Mjolnir at the end was epic, and looks like the Kirby Era hammer. At least it wasn’t the Ultimates hammer.

    Comment by punkazzINC — May 12, 2010 @ 12:19 pm

  5. Wow punkazzINC did you read anything I said? I didn’t say Megan Fox would be a better fit. I said she was just as bad as what Megan Fox would be. I have nothing against her except the fact that she did not fit. Just because you think she is hot doesn’t make her a good actress so get over yourself and actually read before you criticize. Second off mock-up or not it looked like plastic. How does any kind of metal shield that will end up being made of vibranium look like plastic at any point. Third I am not reading into anything. Those three words being directly together is a comic refrence and just because you have never read a comic in your life doesn’t mean you get to be all uppity and act like you now a damn thing about any movies. And finally Cheadle is not god so calm down and Howard would have done just as good a job if not better. Go somewhere else with your hostility and maybe actually watch the movie we are talking about before you speak. Thanks and have a great day. :-)

    Comment by Guy_Jen — May 13, 2010 @ 2:45 pm

  6. Seriously Guy, why can’t you be a good contributor with well stated opinions like BAADASSSSS!? Honestly, have you ever picked up a comic book before the whole Comic book movie revolution, or did you wait until Paris Hilton said it was cool? It looks like you’re the one with the hostility there lil’ man, don’t go into a conniption fit over it. I think I’ll go back to reading real contributions from actual geeks. Thanks for that though, poser.

    Comment by punkazzINC — May 13, 2010 @ 7:29 pm

  7. Quite funny punkazzINC, Think what you need to think but me stating valid and well thought out opinions is exactly what i did but because you didn’t agree i’m the idiot? I am pretty sure that makes you the ridiculous one. Obviously for me to be a geek I have to get approvals for all my opinions through you. My mistake. Have you read anything with Black Widow in it at all? If you had you would have you might realize Johannson was not a good fit. If you disagree good for you but that doesn’t invalidate my opinion. If you don’t want to read my stuff don’t but my difference of opinion does not make me wrong. And no I won’t sit here and insult you and say your not a geek because that’s not what I do but you can sink to that level and be rude instead of actually having an insightful conversation about a movie since that is obviously what makes you happy. You have been nothing but ridiculous from word one of your comments so I am extremely glad you wont read anything I write because I don’t need to fall in step with your opinions and I never will. Thanks for being the typical rude person that hides behind a screen name and criticizes anybody that disagrees with you. Again sir have a great day :-)

    Comment by Guy_Jen — May 14, 2010 @ 4:46 am

  8. Nice comments, guys. I believed Johansson as Black Window, simply because she looked like she could kick ass. I like the little references, to Captain America and the whole SHIELD angle, saying that he’s a small part a the larger thing. They should have did some explaining as to why Rhodey was able to pilot the suit so good. I just assumed that he and Tony worked together and that he granted Rhodey clearance to use it. But what I didn’t understand was how Rhodey was able to power the suit, it had it’s own reactor which I didn’t think could be popped in and out of the suit.

    Also I was surprised at how badly the Hammer bots were made, they were broken in half etc and by that alone shouldn’t War Machine have been equally fragile since it was modified so much.

    And lastly I was disappointed that the final battle was so short and uneventful. All of this build up and Whiplashes upgrades and a 2 against one fight was just too short. At least it wasn’t as bad as the Superman and Lex fight in Superman returns, oh wait there wasn’t a fight in that movie…

    Comment by MovieFan — May 14, 2010 @ 1:54 pm

  9. You have been nothing but ridiculous from word one of your comments so
    I am extremely glad you wont read anything I write because I don’t need
    to fall in step with your opinions and I never will.

    Comment by lacoste online shop — May 9, 2011 @ 7:14 pm

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