| 13 WTF Moments From ‘The Day The Earth Stood Still’ Remake |
 I finally got out to see The Day The Earth Stood Still remake, starring Keanu Reeves and Jennifer Connelly. I made sure to see it in IMAX because from what I could tell from the preview footage, the special effects are amazing and would definitely be heightened by the IMAX experience.
I’m a big fan of the original 1951 film by director Robert Wise and not so keen on remakes, which is why I wasn’t running out to see this movie when it was released in early December. The story centers on Klaatu, an alien who comes to Earth wanting to speak to its leaders about their destructive behavior. In the original, made during the Cold War, Klaatu warns that unless the human race ceases its warmongering, they will be destroyed. In the remake, Klaatu also threatens the extinction of the human race, but because humanity has been deemed a threat to the Earth itself. As far as the special effects and aesthetics go, this film from director Scott Derrickson does not disappoint. Klaatu’s glowing spherical spaceship landing in Central Park is such a sight to behold that I’m willing to let it go that people — including a woman with a baby stroller! — are just standing there watching it land … and then have to run for the damn lives. But how does the film hold up beyond the special effects? Well, like I mentioned, I don’t really go for remakes, but I do understand the need to “update” storylines for modern audiences when a remake is done. So, the whole environmental aspect of it was expected. To be honest, the story really captured my attention, because I thought it was going in a certain direction, which it turned out NOT to be going in. About two-thirds of the way in, I thought, “Wow, they’re really pulling this off,” then we got to the end. WTF? In my opinion, it totally ruined the movie. With that, here’s 13 moments from The Day The Earth Stood Still remake that made me say “What The Fuck?” Warning — MAJOR SPOILERS
 |  | | Take Me To Your Leader: While Klaatu is recuperating from his bullet-wound, government agents attempt to get him to explain his intentions. (And might I add that these agents seem pretty friggin’ lenient? I think they were harder on Indiana Jones in Crystal Skull). All Klaatu will really say is that he wants to speak to the world leaders at the United Nations. So, it’s decided that Klaatu will undergo “interrogation,” which the scientists all strongly oppose. Meanwhile, this seemingly immoral practice is just a fucking lie detector test!!! Granted, they planned to use a drug to get Klaatu to talk, but still, they didn’t take him to Guantanamo Bay! And seriously, some alien lands in the middle of Central Park and doesn’t feel like spilling the beans, I have no problem with aggressive questioning. |
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| | | The Escaped Convict: For some reason, Helen feels a connection to Klaatu and is able to help him escape. Once he’s on the loose, a warning is sent out on all news stations with Klaatu’s picture stating that he’s an escaped convict who’s considered to be very dangerous. They do this in an effort to NOT cause worldwide panic — umm… allow me to remind you at this time that the entire damn world already KNOWS a damn spaceship has landed in Central Park AND that miniature spaceship orbs have landed in places throughout the world. The damn footage is already on YouTube! How the hell could warning the public that hey, THIS GUY IS THE ALIEN be a problem? Would anyone really give a damn that an escaped convict is on the run when AN ALIEN has just landed? |
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| | | In Federal Custody: So, we know the the gov’t takes Helen from her home without explanation, saying only that she’s “in Federal custody now.” She’s then briefed on the alien situation, gets to see and speak to Klaatu, and is even given a sample of the placenta-like substance that Klaatu sheds after he’s shot; she was also privy to the fact that Klaatu was to be interrogated and was even the one to give him the injection (and unbeknownst to anyone else, gave him a saline solution instead of the “truth serum” type drug). Yet, after Klaatu escapes custody, we next see Helen back at home with her young stepson Jacob (Jaden Smith). As if the government would have just let her go back home like nothing happened! NO WAY! Her ass would have been in “Federal custody” FOREVER. |
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| | | Ample NYC Parking: Klaatu makes his way from the military facility in New Jersey to Grand Central Station in Manhattan, trying to get back to his ship. This guy has the power to walk on water and raise the dead (thank you, biblical nods), yet he has to take the train? Even more ridiculous is when Helen is called down to Grand Central to pick up Klaatu, she actually has a place to park!!! There’s no where to park in Manhattan on a good day, forget about on the day a spaceship lands. |
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| | | Toxic Dump, New Jersey: OK, so now Helen has jeopardized herself by helping Klaatu escape, then goes and picks him up at the train station, then drives him to a forest in New Jersey, all the while not even knowing his intentions. Technically, every bad thing that happens after Klaatu’s escape is HER fault. Anyhow, Keanu Reeves has about 10 minutes’ worth of dialogue in the entire film, and after a lot of awkward silence and staring Klaatu finally reveals that he’s come to wipe out humanity, because humans are destroying the Earth and the Earth is too galactically valuable to be harmed by stupid humans. Ok, I’ll buy that. Helen immediately pleads, “We can change!” (yeah, how many times have we heard that?). What she should have done is explain that they were standing in the toxic waste dump that’s New Jersey and that, hey, lots of us recycle. |
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| | | Rioting, Stealing, and Looting … But We Can Change!: Several times, Helen pleads to Klaatu that humans can change their harmful ways to become better. Then, she takes Klaatu to see John Cleese’s Nobel Prize-winning scientist Dr. Barnhardt, who tells Klaatu that civilizations always change their ways when they’re at a precipice, when their survival is threatened. Meanwhile, all you see in the film are people rioting and looting; even at Grand Central, Klaatu sees firsthand survival of the fittest in action. Also, throughout the film, Klaatu and his gigantic robot GORT are being shot at by the military and, at the end, when they’re almost at the spaceship, the President of the United States orders them to be bombed when they get near the ship. So, can you really blame Klaatu for thinking we’re a bunch of assholes? |
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| | | GORT Gets A CT Scan: Let’s address the GORT situation: When Klaatu first arrives in his ship, we see a gigantic robot appear with him. The robot, which the gov’t later dubs GORT (Genetically Organized Robotic Technology), goes into attack mode when Klaatu is shot and we see the power of destruction that the robot is capable of. Klaatu basically tells the robot to stand down, but we later find out that the robot activates in the presence of violence. Somehow, the military is able to capture the robot and bring it to an underground testing facility, and we learn that they’ve run a battery of tests on it — including MRIs and CT Scans. HA HA HA!!!! This robot is HUGE. Seriously, as big as a skyscraper. Someone please tell me HOW in hell were they able to give this thing a damn MRI? C’mon now. |
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| | | The Price: At the end of the film, we find out that while Klaatu can stop the GORT plague from finishing its mission, humanity will have to pay a price. We see ALL of the electricity being shut down throughout the world. One of the areas we see is a car manufacturing plant — there’s a friggin alien invasion and worldwide panic, yet they’re still making cars!?! I guess they’re really putting their Gov’t bailout loans to work, but who is buying a car right now? Shut it down! Anyhow, the “price” is apparently no more electricity or technology. So, the plague won’t kill ANY MORE people (cuz it’s already killed a shitload), but there won’t be anymore electricity or technology. Speaking as someone living in a first-world country, I can seriously say Klaatu should have let GORT just finish the job. Not only has GORT already wiped out large portions of a populated area, but now there won’t be any real way to repair the damage. And anyone living in a high-rise building — good luck; those of us who run a website — so much for that; anyone in a plane — crash, boom, dead; all those people in hospitals — dead; everyone who needs medications — dead. Yeah, you can argue that humans have evolved from cave dwellers, therefore, we’d know how to start over. But still, that’s gonna take a long-ass time; in the meanwhile, we’re all fucked. |
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I finally got out to see The Day The Earth Stood Still remake, starring Keanu Reeves and Jennifer Connelly. I made sure to see it in IMAX because from what I could tell from the preview footage, the special effects are amazing and would definitely be heightened by the IMAX experience.
Klaatu Gets His Ass Shot: It’s revealed that a group of alien races has been watching the people of Earth for nearly a century, and know everything about the ways of humanity. They can clone a human body to send their representative — Klaatu — to Earth; they know our languages; they know how we survive (food, water, etc.), and they were able to decipher and break through our military defense systems. So why doesn’t Klaatu know that if you break through said defense systems, invade our air space, and land your damn ship in one of most populated cities in the world, you gonna get your ass shot?
The Useless Scientists: When the U.S. government realizes that an object is about to impact with the Earth, they gather a bunch of scientists and engineers, who then have less than two hours to do something about the situation. Once they’re briefed — one of whom is Jennifer Connelly’s astrobiologist Dr. Helen Benson — we don’t see them do a damn thing. Next we see them bracing for the impact of the object, which ends up being Klaatu’s ship that doesn’t crash, but gracefully lands in Central Park in New York City. Let’s face it, if this was an Armageddon-type movie, those scientists would have figured out how to stop/impede/slow down/avoid the object’s impact and then Will Smith or Ben Affleck would have implemented the solution. In this movie, they just wasted all that time with the scientists in order to get Helen to meet Klaatu.
The Clever U.S. Secretary of Defense: The reason Klaatu has to go into the forests of New Jersey (where he walks on that water) we learn is to activate these mini Orbs which act as Arks, collecting various species to save when GORT’s “plague” is unleashed. Back at the military headquarters, you know, where all those scientists were detained to “help” with the situation but were then just let go, the agents and the U.S. Secretary of Defense Regina Jackson (Kathy Bates) watch the movements of the Orbs. Luckily, those scientists weren’t really needed because Jackson of all the people there is able to figure out that the Orbs are actually Arks of biblical proportions.
The Infamous Indestructible Cloverfield Bridge: I’m not sure it was really necessary for GORT to turn into millions of tiny locust-like metallic bugs which become the “plague” that wipes out humanity. But, the plague looks really awesome as we see it easily wipe out the entire Meadowlands Sports Complex in NJ (which contains Giants Stadium) in a matter of seconds. Eventually, the GORT plague rampages its way back to Central Park, where Klaatu, Helen, and Jacob are taking shelter from it underneath the infamous “Cloverfield bridge.” We see the bugs all around them, yet nothing is happening to that damn little bridge. Why isn’t the plague destroying the bridge too? Why does that bridge elude all attackers? Why is it the only indestructible landmark in NYC? Seriously, the Cloverfield monster was able to crush his way through Manhattan, yet when he got to that bridge … oh, duped!
A [Stupid] Reason To Save Humanity: Ok, so obviously, Klaatu has to change his mind about killing off humanity. Helen has pleaded with him, the kid has been cute with him, and the Nobel Prize winner bonded with him over an equation. But what is the reason that tips his decision in our favor? Does he see humans banding together in peace and harmony? Does everyone pledge to recycle? Nope. What does it is he sees how much Helen loves her stepson. Please excuse me when I say this, but so fucking what? There’s millions of people who love their relatives. And loving one another wasn’t really the issue that the alien conglomerate had, was it? It was the fact that humans were destroying the Earth with their damaging habits, so what does Helen and Jacob’s relationship have to do with anything!?!!
Brilliant, as always. :-)
Comment by Dave2 — January 5, 2009 @ 1:34 am
He’s Christ in the same way he was in the Matrix. It’s an allegory. He represents civilizations. Watch the movie not from a we need to stop global warming and he is the second coming. That’s what I took from the good nailed parts of the flick but the rest of the movie was just one step up from Independence day. Enjoyed it as a bit of brainless schlock but when are we going to get a really scientific and accurate Sci-Fi movie with the sort of info and in depth thinking that really does get us all cooking?
Comment by Dave — January 5, 2009 @ 8:40 am
I forgot all about the film until I read this one.
Much better than film to be honest.
It was very heavy handed at times.
The end reminded of a Gamera film.
Comment by Jerry — January 5, 2009 @ 9:10 am
1)They didn’t break thru-they shut down military defenses. No reason for Klaatu to know he was going to be shot.
2)They want to ask him questions-so what-Wouldn’t you??? This point was stupid on your part.
3)They were the “first” ones to encounter the aliens.It makes sense to send scientists doesn’t it???
4)And have every Tom,Dick, and Harry going after an alien with guns??? Come on-you sound like an idiot here. You have to be smarter than that.
5)They didn’t know what she did-they let the others go why not her??
6)Ever here of double parking in NYC??
7)Haha-Ok I’ll give you this.
8)Maybe they were athiests!!!She was the only Religious one!
9)No-I can’t blame him for thinking that but one of his own was willing to stay and die with us. Remember that part??? Goof!!
10)It the Government for gosh sakes!!!Come on man-your nit picking.
11)Cloverfield Bridge was made from “natural”earth. Stones, Dirt ect… It stands to reason why it didn’t get destroyed!!Sheesh.
12)See my retort on #9
13)I do agree here-ending needed only 7 words to be a better ending. Klaatu to Helen “Tell them we are watching”. Helen “I will.”
Comment by tia — January 5, 2009 @ 10:36 am
Eve, this is the best thing i’ve read about TDTESS! It was hilarious and every point you make is bang on.
More articles like this please!
Comment by Bondy — January 5, 2009 @ 12:19 pm
Mostly sounds like the author has a stick up his ass. This article is a lot of ranting, if you didn’t like the movie who cares. There are plenty of people who did. Quit analyzing every detail in every movie. Just watch it and accept it for what it is. You ruined your own movie-going experience, not the movie.
Comment by Anonymous — January 5, 2009 @ 3:18 pm
All I can say is that it was a totally awesome movie!
Comment by John James — January 5, 2009 @ 3:18 pm
One thing I think you missed – why the hell would they bring the scientists in helicopters to the site of a massive asteroid collision right before it happens. I mean, sure, assemble a top-notch team of scientists to see if there’s any chance of deflecting the asteroid, but then… take them to the impact site? What possible good can they do at the epicenter of a (literally) earth-shattering event? They’re not medical doctors…
Did the army bring them there so they would have a quick, merciful death?
Comment by jb — January 5, 2009 @ 3:28 pm
Hahaha that’s amazing. I’ve seen the original many times and was not too keen on the idea of a remake. There are so many remakes now-a-days.
I knew they would ruin this damn film. Knew it.
Comment by Timothy — January 5, 2009 @ 3:56 pm
nerd rage…. zzzz
Comment by bobo — January 5, 2009 @ 3:58 pm
Ye gads, this was a funny review! Haven’t seen the movie, but loved your review.
Comment by Helen Ginger — January 5, 2009 @ 4:01 pm
The bridge wasn’t destroyed because keanue reeves was using his magical alien powers to protect it. duh.
Comment by Austen — January 5, 2009 @ 4:06 pm
1 – getting shot was likely a known risk he had to take.
2 – best not to get mid evil with a guy that owns a spaceship and a giant robot.
3 – there isn’t much scientists can implement in 2 hours. Either the UFO intercept nukes are ready, or they aren’t.
4 – see #1. The earth authorities understand the risks of Jim-Bob meeting an alien face-to-face.
5 – this one is hard to explain. Maybe hiding in the last place they would expect you to be?
6 – A case of folks deciding not to come to work near a spaceship. That spaceship could blow stuff up!
7 – Can’t blame her for not bringing up a toxic dump at that point.
8 – Anyone could have made the intellectual leap. She was in a position to see the big picture.
9 – he’s worried about the environment, not our military. But yeah, didn’t help our cause any.
10 – Advanced military technology. Coming to a clinic near you in a decade or two.
11 – uh, good engineering?
12 – yes, that was lame.
13 – Klaatu’s taking out some insurance that humans will indeed change. Acceptable collateral damage to save humanity.
Comment by Nikkon — January 5, 2009 @ 4:13 pm
They did explain a few of these items. they mentioned planes still had power for one.
Comment by J — January 5, 2009 @ 4:33 pm
I saw the movie a week ago, with low expectations, but I found it better than the under-the-bus-tossing that critics have been ranting. In regards to your comments, I think you’ve got valid point with 5, but I’ll forgive that. As for your other issues:
1. Klaatu is shot in the first movie as well, albeit a different part of the movie. Secondly, part of the point was that the aliens could disable all the computer technology easy, but guns are chemical explosions and kinetic energy. Additionally, if you’re a superior race, you need to exhibit a little trust in the beginning during first contact.
2. I think it’s safe to assume worse would have been done, but they barely had the time nor opportunity to do worse. Also, it’s a statement about how arrogant we are as humans – we just shot Klaatu, and so we think we have some upper hand, when it’s absolutely clear he was showing extreme restraint. (Such as the lengths he goes to not kill people when it’s clear he can.)
3. Armageddon-type movies, as you say, both have the advantage of time (I seem to remember that the scientists had all of 1 hour of prep, including transit) and of being action films. See, in action films, you can do ridiculous crap like land oil-drillers on an asteroid flying as ridiculous speeds and then nuke it, all while Aerosmith’s playing. #3 is probably the most silly of all of your objections. THE FACT THAT IT WAS NOT A CRAPPY ARMAGEDDON TYPE MOVIE IS A GOOD THING!
4. Yes, few people gave a damn, but I assumed that’s also why it took so long for them to get caught.
6. Hm, 3 ways to answer this:
One – Taking mass transit is pretty efficient in New York, and a good way to stay off the radar. Flying around in New York would have been a good way to get noticed.
Two – After being shot and mutating into human form, Klaatu had no super-suit that would have enabled him to travel superfast.
Three – He didn’t need to travel, since he assumed the Earth would be purged, so he was in no rush; instead, he traveled with the humans he found intriguing, and they didn’t have super-speed technology.
As for the parking – that’s a pretty common sin among movie-making. The director lets characters park in front of the building that they need to go into in order to provide an excuse for an establishing shot for that location. No big deal.
7. *forehead smack* I’m not even going to address this one as it’s futile to argue with someone who is prejudiced against New Jersey. (But clearly your comment was tongue-in-cheek, anyway, so it wouldn’t count as a serious WTF? moment anyway.)
8. “Clever”? Really? I figured it out within 5 seconds. So did everyone else in the theater, I assumed.
9. Your criticism is the whole point of the movie. Yes, we are, in fact, assholes, but yes, we do, in fact, deserve a chance to live. Congrats, you’ve just empathized with Klaatu, meaning the movie-makers were successful at making a human empathize with an advanced species bent on our elimination. Sounds like they did a good job, then, with that?
10. He’s not as big as a skyscraper. Maybe 100 feet tall; his head was about 2 – 3 times the size of the person, I judged. Plus, they didn’t seem to do anything violent to him – the scans didn’t penetrate, and the drill bit seemed ineffective. It was something so insignificant that Gort didn’t even care.
11. The way I took it, the swarm was eating up non-natural stuff. The bridge was made of stone. … but, yeah, they dawdled a little bit too long, I think, and by that time the swarm should have come under the tunnel. Still. Big whoop.
12. I know this may be hard to grasp, but sometimes characters are representative of things. It was REALLY REALLY OBVIOUS that the little boy was a metaphor for all humanity. We’re fragile, we throw temper tantrums, we are naive and don’t understand what we do, we get angry, etc etc. To an advanced species, we *all* look like little children, if even that much. It should have been obvious all along that, being this metaphor, the child would have to be the tipping point for Klaatu. If you don’t understand that, really, seriously, you’re watching too many action movies and not enough movies with actual plot.
13. That’s kind of the point. We’ve been on the brink of utter global destruction ever since the invention of the atomic bomb. THAT’S A BIG REASON WHY THE ORIGINAL MOVIE WAS MADE IN THE FIRST PLACE. Nowadays we have nukes, biological, and chemical weapons, and the looming threat of ecological or economic global collapse. We are, as a civilization, making cars right up to the end.
That said, clearly the ball emitted an EMP shock way that went around the Earth and enabled all active electronic devices. It’s open-ended whether non-active devices would work, or if all were shut down, but that’s the beauty of the movie – it’s a SOCIAL COMMENTARY and it’s meant to MAKE YOU THINK ABOUT HOW WE REALLY ARE AS PEOPLE, not to neatly wrap the sci-fi up in explanations of how warp-drives and teleporters work.
I like to say, “OH MY GOD! SEATBELTS!” whenever I get into a nerdy rant with Star Trek. Star Trek, like much of science fiction, takes GREAT liberties with the technology it presents. We’re left with holodecks and food replicators, and yet … no seatbelts.
Naturally, the creator of the work of science fiction won’t always be right, or even remotely right. But good science fiction is less about the technical accuracies, and more about the social commentary – the effect technology has on us as human beings. That’s what separates science fiction from mere space action and adventure genre. (Star Wars 4-6 = Sci-Fi, Aliens = Space Action)
Comment by Ron — January 5, 2009 @ 4:34 pm
Great points!
I remember asking my wife why humanity would change now? Assuming he flew flew away and the power never came back on, he didn’t change humanity at all, and the 0.00000001% of humans who know the actual reason can’t tell anyone else since civilization is about to break down (think how many people are not within walking distance of a food source.) Was the purpose to buy a couple hundred years or so before humanity once again got good enough to threaten the planet?
Given the premise, what he should have done was wipe out a big piece (bigger than a stadium and whatever portion of NYC is between NJ and Central Park) of the planet and announce that in 100 years it better be a paradise or GORT finishes the job.
Comment by Mark — January 5, 2009 @ 4:51 pm
One more WTF moment – when talking to the old chinese guy, he decides he likes the world and its people so much that he is willing to die with it just so he can live for a couple more days as a human, yet the planet is not worth saving…. and Reeves doesn’t even ask him why?
Comment by Mark — January 5, 2009 @ 4:53 pm
you’re quite right in all your analysis of human behavior. based on our species’ past experiences the most likely first action we’ll take when meeting an alien is:
1. kill it
2. eat it
3. enslave it
only after humanity as a whole has completely tried all of these three actions, will we finally even be open to the option:
4. say “hi” to it
Comment by andronen — January 5, 2009 @ 5:02 pm
One thing you failed to mention… they wipe out electricity/technology right!? And they do this because we are destroying the environment, right? What the hell are people going to do to get back up and running… it’s got to be simple… it’s got to be easy and available all over the place… it’s got to require no power or technology to setup and produce…
so I’m sure it will take about 24 hours before people start burning MORE FOSSIL FUELS!!!! Smart plan Klaatu!
Crap movie fo sure.
Comment by Shawn — January 5, 2009 @ 5:10 pm
Two other things. 1) Klaatu is covered with a placenta-like substance that he later uses to heal himself when injured. Why the hell didn’t it heal him when he was first shot and he was covered with the stuff? 2) The military brings GORT to “Bluemont, VA”. Bulltwinkies. First of all, that is way too far away from NYC to be practical. Second, I live 10 minutes from Bluemont and it looks nothing like what the film shows. Bluemont is mostly trees, a few houses, and a few tiny roads. It is part of the foothills of the Blue Ridge Mountain chain. The scene in the movie was sand and scrub brush, like near a desert.
Comment by Twriter — January 5, 2009 @ 5:12 pm
Nice list. I enjoyed the movie. I liked the first and this one isn’t half bad. About the time when Klaatu revives that dead police man my friend looked over to me and said: Dude! I know who he is. (Who?) He’s Jesus! The Second coming!. I laughed my butt off and then realized. He is god in two movies. Except there are no agents in this one.
Comment by Brandon — January 5, 2009 @ 5:30 pm
That’s just the tip of the iceberg.
Would aliens go to the Karakoram Mtn range to get Keanu Reeves’ DNA? You don’t think they could organize a meeting of world leaders to meet the alien? If they had killed Klaatu, then I guess he couldn’t have activated the destruct mode of the orb, so saving him was the wrong move? Was this a one man/alien decision? Seems that they would have thought it all through before coming here. The locusts sure took their time munching their way through Klaatu and company at the end. I guess they just like stadiums and trucks better.
etc. etc. etc.
How come studio executives, writers, directors can’t make something that makes sense?
Exactly the disappointment everyone expected.
Comment by sagesparrow — January 5, 2009 @ 5:31 pm
1) You’re right, however, if I was an alien I would recognize that risk and go anyways. You can’t go into a humans head and disarm them like electronics.
2) Kudos for them for not torturing. I wish the world really was like that.
3) Please! Two hours isn’t enough time to do anything but fire any missiles you have at it. There isn’t anything else that could have been done realistically.
4) Telling the population that there hunting down an alien is NOT a good idea. You say we’re looking for some guy and they call in a tip. No big deal. You say we’re looking for an alien and he’d have gotten his ass shot many many a more times. There are several ways to react when you see an alien wanted by the police.
5)Yeah, she wouldn’t have been going home anytime soon
6)Parking is a WTF moment?!?!?!? True enough I guess
7)You are arguing against a very possible remark for an insult on New Jersey…. like the existence of hundreds of ‘New Jerseys’ isn’t the problem…. yeah…..
8) Fully agree
9) Absolutely. I guess I would argue that I, personally, have seen a lot of good in some very damaged people. That would certainly be enough for me to stop from destroying them.
10) Yeah… that is pretty friggan dumb… That’s one of the situations where you try to be vague. Stick to what you find out, now how you did it.
11) This list started off so weak but is ending so strong. I HATED the whole plague. That was…..
12) I don’t think that was it. I never picked up on that. He never said that.
13) And that is exactly the way to do it. Good job on pointing out how they did things right. Like aliens should wait for every plane to land safely and every car to reach it’s destination and continuing to allow electricity for every single pacemaker or other life saving device. Way to end an a fart.
Comment by Tyler Paul — January 5, 2009 @ 5:34 pm
One thing you forgot is..
If these advanced civilization are watching us ruin earth, why dont they, instead of exterminating us, gives us better technologies so that we dont ruin it..such as an energy source which is not damaging to the environment and easy to obtain…
Comment by omer — January 5, 2009 @ 5:38 pm
“Why isn’t the plague destroying the bridge too?”
Klaatu: – We can’t keep them out for long.
Comment by wiseass — January 5, 2009 @ 5:55 pm
WTF?
What an american hostility is this?
WHen I saw the movie I had the exact opposite reaction.
Why all the aggression? Why the hostile interrogation? Why shoot the alien? And put the robot in the “box”? (The box thing was funny though)
My friends and I discussed how this was a typical american reaction to an alien encounter.
But you say their reactions were too mild. I say they were too friggin hostile. No wonder they wanted to whipe out the friggin planet.
When watching I hoped they would do it.
it was a pretty lame reason why he was convinced to stop the GORT.
All in all a typical overreacted american flick.
Oh and the kid of Will Smith, please let him never act again.
Comment by SD — January 5, 2009 @ 5:55 pm
#11 Please don’t think that I’m trying to defend this atrocity of a film but I thought Klaatu say something like “I don’t know how much longer I can hold them off here”… Everything else is fairly accurate. good job.
Comment by nunya bidness — January 5, 2009 @ 5:58 pm
You forgot to mention the other alien already living on earth. That alien became attached to the humans and didn’t want to leave. I believe Klaatu also became attached to Helen and her step son and therefore didn’t have the heart to destroy everyone.
Also, how would the military figure out that Helen gave him saline? I thought the reason the didn’t arrest her was that they figured the drug must not have had any effect on Klaatu.
You are dead on about when the orb landing. I was saying why aren’t the people running!!!
Comment by Kathy — January 5, 2009 @ 6:07 pm
The movie was long anticipated.
Finally saw it.
It sucked!
Stupid story… annoying kid… annoying, stupid do nothing scientists. Change of heart of the politician for no reason.
Boy this movie sucked big time.
Even Cloverfield (also sucked) was better.
Comment by S. Huber — January 5, 2009 @ 6:19 pm
I think #11 doesn’t apply. The reason is that Keanu says something like, “I can’t keep them at bay for long.” I agree with the rest though.
Heath
Comment by heathsnow — January 5, 2009 @ 6:29 pm
I went into the movie with very very low expectations,and naturally, the movie was not so bad. I really liked the first one, and to be honest, they didn’t do too bad with the second.
Comment by Jay — January 5, 2009 @ 8:10 pm
One thing Klaatu probably didn’t consider: by frying all electronics worldwide, he’s disabled the cooling tanks inside the world’s nuclear power plants. It would only be a matter of hours before all the rods inside the tanks heat up and reach critical mass, and the Earth is riddled with hundreds of nuclear explosions. Radioactive fallout, nuclear winter, starvation & disease will soon follow. Thanks for saving us, Klaatu! You’re the greatest!
Comment by redskull — January 5, 2009 @ 9:54 pm
so….gort is like..galactus. and klaatu is like the silver surfer. so where is dem dam fantastic fours?
Comment by peter — January 6, 2009 @ 12:21 am
As Butters from South Park Said”I though it was pretty good!”
Comment by Nathan — January 6, 2009 @ 2:48 am
Did anyone notice.. They didnt bring back all those arks with our animals on it.. So now that we’ve like lost all the technology, we cant even hunt our food because they took all the animals? I think the whole mission of Klaatu was to steal our animals to finish off the intergalactic zoo without any of us objecting.
Comment by Josh McKenzie — January 6, 2009 @ 4:05 am
Hey Man
Your point 3 – The Useless Scientists and Point 12 – A [Stupid] Reason To Save Humanity make me laugh non stop. Me and my wife went for the movie and ended up commented this stupid movie for 3 days!
Comment by tinghook — January 6, 2009 @ 4:40 am
Those nano bugs eating everything in it’s path, WHY?
klaatu wants to save the earth from humans, yet those bugs destroys everything in site, plants, animals, etc…
so what if he saves a few animals in his orb arc, without plants, earth has no atmosphere or food for those animals anyway.
Comment by DillDoe — January 6, 2009 @ 5:13 am
Really good article. Inspite all this I managed to enjoy this movie, however the end was completely dissapointing. After all, the alien leaves without addressing mankind about his purposes and the problem itself! To humans this would have been an impossible to understand, unjustified attack. I mean, the entire world will have to rely on the words of a single common human being!
A simple scene with Klaatu speaking to the UN would have solved everything. Oh, but I forgot: GORT possibly demolished the UN and the entire Manhattan area as well.
Comment by Leandro Tami — January 6, 2009 @ 7:24 am
About the bridge part, didn’t Klaatu say that we was “holding it off” but couldn’t hold it for very long?
Still way far fetched, but I believe I heard him say something like that.
Comment by Gp — January 6, 2009 @ 8:57 am
meh…yawn.
Comment by meh — January 6, 2009 @ 12:39 pm
I simply loved the original movie. I would not see this remake if you paid me. The original movie was filled with concern for mankind, which comes across beautifully, for example, in the scene in Arlington cemetery. This movie sounds like it is filled with contempt for mankind.
When did science fiction movies join the ranks of techno-phobic neo-Luddites? All electronic devices are wiped out, killing everyone with a pacemaker and condemning more than half of the world’s population to starvation (current population levels cannot be maintained absent current mechanical means to grow and store and move food) and forcing the remainder back into an agrarian existence – and this is supposed to be social commentary?
One of the big advantages of science fiction is that it makes a comment on the relation of man to technology. If so, this movie is not science fiction, it is the fiction of anti-science.
Comment by John Wright — January 6, 2009 @ 2:30 pm
11: When they’re under the bridge Klaatu clearly states “I can’t keep them out for long”, suggesting that he’s somehow temporarily keeping them from swarming beneath the bridge.
The rest, agreed.
Comment by Dan — January 7, 2009 @ 2:35 pm
This review is WAY more full of holes than the movie.
First off, I’ll skip the grammar, which really makes this article unreadable.
Second, look up logical fallacy, and count how many times you ignore these rules.
I’ll bitch about a few of your points, then drop it.
The bridge in Cloverfield WAS destroyed. Why do you say it’s safe? The thing gets demolished and falls to pieces. Did that movie not end with bricks falling and the actors getting covered in rubble?
Airplanes are always X-rayed during maintenance, to look for cracks and weaknesses in the structure. Google it. The MRI/Xray technology is not limited to your ankle, dude.
Complaining about the government is always silly! Our government constantly blows things. Our president read a childrens book for 15 minutes after being told that our country is under attack from terrorists. What makes you think we would handle an alien invasion any better???
The ending DOES suck, but it’s an enjoyable film none the less. You have to suspend some belief to enjoy it. What, you walked into a Hollywood remake starring Keanu Reeves and expected Blade Runner? If I were you I would focus on your own derailed thoughts, and leave the movies to the pros.
Comment by Greg — January 14, 2009 @ 10:06 am
@Greg
It was so “unreadable” that you were able to not only READ IT, but understand it and make your own counterpoints. Yeah, you’re a genius.
Comment by Empress Eve — January 14, 2009 @ 9:04 pm
Is it now mandatory that every movie have a interracial relationship with a negro?
That stupid retarded kid of hers would have made me want to destroy the earth too.
Yeah, Hollywood nepotism strikes again. That kid ruined the movie.
Comment by eric g — January 26, 2009 @ 12:40 am
The special effect are really good but overall the film is very poor
Comment by Pinky — January 29, 2009 @ 8:33 am
yawn movie sucked
Comment by mercedes — January 30, 2009 @ 9:30 pm
15: They fired AIM-9 Sidewinder missiles at a giant robot. A really big robot! These are infra red seeking Air-to-Air missiles which -can- knock down aircraft, and have been known to take out a light truck. But AIM-9… and they went to a lot of trouble to do it as well!
Comment by MiGMan — February 6, 2009 @ 1:47 pm
1. I think your proposition that the killing GORT causes the power to be out forever, is a little stretched. There is nothing in the film to make that claim. It could easily just have been a global EMP and, as such, effects would be temporary.
2. I agree with comments of eric g, the kid should have been terminated early in the film. It would have provided viewers with a feeling of deep satisfaction.
3. Really important point. In the original Klaatu leaves a message “we are watching you”, “change or die”. In this movie he just leaves, no message. You can see the message the humans will take from this. “We beat the bastards, no need to change. We need bigger weapons”.
4. I think there should be a law: If you remake a movie and make a hash of it, we should be allowed to staple the director’s pink bits to a wall. (also included would be the directors of Planet of the Apes remake).
Comment by Orcbighter — February 6, 2009 @ 6:41 pm
“I agree with comments of eric g, the kid should have been terminated early in the film. It would have provided viewers with a feeling of deep satisfaction”
^^^ Only viewers residing deep in the south, where watching interracial stuff always awakes the inner crackah in them and makes them grab a gun, stuff their sisters/daughters in a basement and wrap themselves with the confederate flag.
Silly mo-fo’s.
About the movie… yeah it blows chunks. Remakes almost always do… always.
Comment by Ed — February 16, 2009 @ 6:14 pm
highfive @ ron. you said it brother.
Comment by Lukasz — May 13, 2009 @ 10:49 pm
we don’t agree with why the kid should die, just that he should, he was moronic bastard who couldn’t follow simple directions, they should have drowned that freak and cleaned up the gene pool.
Comment by dontgvafck — June 24, 2014 @ 12:31 am
obviously because the alien refused to answer any basic questions after threatening us, should have killed him and the kid
Comment by no — June 24, 2014 @ 12:35 am
Might I suggest that nearly all comments missed the point and purpose of this movie (with the exception of the shout against the neo-luddites)? This movie is in psychopolitical speak, “predictive programming.” The alien species represents a clique of elitist intellectuals who influence international policies through economics. Their mission statement is on the Georgia guidestones…to depopulate the earth to 500 million … to render the remaining population subject to primitive, “ecological” living … basically a company store owner’s paradise.
This predictive programming is meant to plant acceptance of the idea that human population must be reduced and people must have their consumption forcibly reduced to neolithic levels (while they will still be required to work at modern standards). This movie is just a sounding board for a bunch of genocidal elitists to gloat about their ultimate fantasy of playing God with all nations and races. These elitists consider themselves “far more advanced” than the rest of us peasants.
Comment by Red Camel — August 18, 2014 @ 12:45 am
This is the dream and mandate of the eugenicists that rule the Earth. They co-opted the plebes yet again, now inducing them to feel as though they deserve their own immolation.
Comment by bschec7 — November 15, 2015 @ 1:28 am
The problem is not the lack of better technologies. Klaatu, I believe, said that himself. It’s the wastefulness, the pollution, the wars, the destruction of species, the day to day cruelties and barbarism, etc. I agree that the human population of the planet would quickly be dramatically reduced by starvation; maybe on the order of 90 percent. At the end of the movie, all forms of power had been eliminated as a condition of not being totally exterminated. Atomic power plants would have been brought safely down in some manner. The SECDEF was stuck in the desert and couldn’t even communicate with POTUS. The human race would be reduced to agriculture; and primitive agriculture at that – e.g., the old push-type plows. Hunting would have been outlawed by the aliens, along with the use of animals to pull plows. However, other species would quickly start to thrive.
Comment by Roger Thornhill — December 3, 2015 @ 3:00 pm
You missed the point entirely, which is the equality and the diversity of species. As depicted in the movie, mankind had become a threat to all other species, and was on the verge of making the planet unlivable. The is a movie that ranks a dolphin on the same level as that of humans. You may not agree, but that’s the premise.
Comment by Roger Thornhill — December 3, 2015 @ 3:10 pm
for point number 2, did you actually type “mid evil” instead of medieval ???
Comment by Tom_Winnipeg — February 18, 2017 @ 11:24 pm
In the original, they made a point to say that he allowed people on life support to continue, and for planes to land, I’m sure its the same in the reboot
Comment by Andrew Douglas — May 19, 2017 @ 10:10 am
All I was hoping for was for the robot to step on that irritating kid…
Comment by Tim Hatcher — December 30, 2021 @ 11:25 am