Hey all you leather-jacket wearing, denim-jean ripping, pit-circle moshing, long-hair whipping, tattoo-covered mother effers”¦..it’s Christmas time! And you know what that means, it’s time to show those mangy metalheads in your life some appreciation by buying them gifts and stuff.

Now I know you probably don’t know nothing about no gift giving, which is why I’m here. That’s right, your good old metal mama is going to recommend some great gifts that you can give your metalhead friends without even having to get up from the computer. Okay, ready? Here goes…

… the 2018 Metalhead’s Holiday Gift Guide…

It’s getting colder. The days are getting shorter, the nights are getting longer, and everyone is so full of Christmas cheer, it makes you want to burn down a church. Worse than that, you have to spend precious beer money on… gifts. Well, whether you have metal buddies who are seriously expecting something this season, or whether you want to give Aunt Mabel something so heinously inappropriate that she will regift it right back to you, you might want to take a look at this list.

Here’s the 2015 Metalhead’s Holiday Gift Guide…

As Google’s front page reminds us, today is the birthday of famous painter Paul Cézanne. While Google decided to use Cézanne’s still life of fruits and tableware for their Doodle, I chose to feature one of the artist’s darker pieces, Pyramid Of Skulls (1901), because, well, I just think it’s so metal. The artist did plenty of other still life paintings of skulls, some of which have skulls and fruit in them.

The 19th-century French Post-Impressionism painter was born 172 years ago on January 19, 1839. His work influenced other great artists, such as Pablo Picasso and Henri Matisse, and art movements like Cubism.