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Mother’s Day Special: Summer Movies 2008: Mom’s First Impressions
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Mom's First Impressions: A Mother's Day SpecialIn honor of Mother’s Day today, I asked my Mom to give me her first impressions on some of the movies featured in the Geeks of Doom Summer Movie Mayhem 2008 preview.

Before we go further, let me tell you a little bit about my cute little Mommy…

My Mom, a former 1960s flower child, is a big movie buff. While she rarely frequents the theaters, she and her husband often settle down at night to watch a Blu-Ray DVD selection on their 60-inch high-definition flatscreen television (with the mega sound system, too). The problem is, Mom rarely makes it to the end of the film before dozing off. There’s a reason for this, which is easily deduced after you read her reaction to Pineapple Express (see below).

Mom also has a problem remember actor’s names (again, see the Pineapple Express entry below). So when she tries to explain to me what a movie was about, it usually involves us playing a game of “Name Burst.” Let’s say the actor in the film is Kurt Russell, here’s what I’ll get before we even get to her movie synopsis:

“Did you see that movie with the good-looking guy with the longish hair, he does action movies, he’s kinda married for a long time — well, I don’t know if they are married or not, but they’re together — to that blonde actress from that funny old Army movie who has the young blonde daughter, she’s an actress too who was in that movie about the rock band with the groupies and the cool music?”

Yeah, let’s just say Mom has a “memory problem” in general. ::: toke:::

But like I said, Mom does LOVE movies, but she’s not really into fantasy films, comic book adaptations, or blockbuster-type movies. Instead, she enjoys psychological thrillers and dramas, as well as anything that will make her laugh. So, when I talk to her about all the movies I’m psyched about, she rarely understands what the hell I’m talking about and I have to spend a lot of time explaining how it is that Dr. Banner turns into the Hulk or why Robert Downey Jr. is wearing a funny suit of armor in the desert.

So with that, below are my Mom’s thoughts on this summer’s upcoming movies.

IRON MAN: It looks ridiculous. It looks like the guy spins around, and then he has this big giant suit on, which seems hot and uncomfortable if you’re in Afghanistan.

SPEED RACER: Oh god, nightmare cartoon that I always hated comes to life.

THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA: PRINCE CASPIAN: I saw the first Narnia movie and it was good. That’s the one with that big lion roaring, right?. I’ll probably like the second one, but I haven’t really seen much about it yet.

INDIANA JONES AND THE KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL: That I can’t wait to see. I loved Raiders of the Lost Ark when it came out. And I like Steven Spielberg movies. I will see this one as soon as it comes out. It doesn’t look like Harrison Ford does his own stunts anymore. Does he? Probably will be my favorite summer movie.

THE STRANGERS: Only because she’s Steven Tyler’s daughter I’ll see it. No, well, she’s a good actress. I like these kinds of movies, psychological thrillers. Though, I’ll probably wait for the DVD. I hope it’s not like Funny Games though. I don’t like movies where one person is forced to watched another person be tortured/terrorized.

THE DARK KNIGHT: I haven’t seen any trailers, but I’ll probably like it. I heard it’s a dark film. I like dark and gloomy. Did I see Batman Begins? No, I don’t think I saw it. Who was in that one, not Jack Nicholson, right?

SEX AND THE CITY: You know they’re getting a little older. I hope everything holds up well.

YOU DON’T MESS WITH THE ZOHAN: This I know I will like, because I like the subject matter. I like Adam Sandler. It should funny.

THE HAPPENING: I’m gonna love this one, the whole mystery illness thing sounds good. I didn’t really like, what was that other one, The Lady In The Lake or something, and The Village was like … ::: humph::: You know, I think there was a mystery illness on a train in Canada recently. Paranoid thrillers like this I typically enjoy.

THE INCREDIBLE HULK: I heard the first one bombed so I don’t expect this one to be any better. I only remember Lou Ferrigno as The Hulk.

GET SMART: This I can’t wait to see. I saw the trailer for this when the girl was like “You looking at my butt?” That’s gotta be funny. Steve Carell is hysterical.

MAMMA MIA: I wouldn’t see this.

X-FILES 2: My husband will love it. X-Files was good, but I wasn’t a fanatic, although my daughter says this is “my bag.”

PINEAPPLE EXPRESS: Anything with weed count me in!

STAR WAR: THE CLONE WARS: Don’t think so, I don’t like animated (sorry Evie).

TROPIC THUNDER: That’s probably going to be one of the best movies. Robert Downey. Jr, he’s in that Iron Man movie. I like him. To see him playing a black actor will be interesting. I hear in this one they go into the jungle into a real war, but that they don’t know it’s real. That sounds funny.


  1. Maybe my favorite article on summer movies yet.

    Comment by Jerry — May 11, 2008 @ 4:46 pm

  2. Your Mom sounds pretty freakin’ cool!

    Comment by Shannon the Movie Moxie — May 11, 2008 @ 6:15 pm

  3. This is freakin’ awesome! I loved reading this.

    Comment by The Rub — May 11, 2008 @ 6:40 pm

  4. “I think there was a mystery illness on a train in Canada recently.” WTF? “Anything with weed count me in!” Mama Empress is friggin’ hilarious. You should give her her own column!

    Comment by Slayve — May 12, 2008 @ 2:36 pm

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