Ghoul day to you all, my living lunches. It’s your favorite Zombie correspondent who also happens to be a Zombie… ol’ Obvious.

So here I am repeatedly walking into a wall in some strange apartment (zombies lack a certain amount of navigational skills, shut up) when I bumped the little hollow-headed lad laying most un-flatteringly across a table (this morning’s breakfast). Glowing amidst the grue and gunk, his laptop screen captivated me. I moved closer and found myself incredibly happy. After my eye adjusted (yeah, I have one) I read this.

Get this… some awesome meatbag took the Jane Austen über-classic novel Pride and Prejudice and mashed up with a horde of undead and retitled this newly minted horror tale Pride and Prejudice and Zombies … and the Hollywood feeding frenzy for it has already begun!

During an impromptu intervention on The Office concerning Meredith’s obvious drinking problem, affable fleshbag Michael Scott ask the question, “What about tomorrow? What is going to happen when you come in to work and you’re dead?”

Office ghast Dwight quickly responds, “I stab her in the brain with a wooden stick.”

Then it cuts to the patented Office solo sidebar-cam, where Dwight goes on to inform us all that “There are several ways to kill a zombie, but” he continues “…the most satisfying one is to stab it in the brain with a wooden stick.”

Bring it on, Dwight. I may be dead, but I got skills, son.

Check out the quick replay video of last night’s episode “Moroccan Christmas” — Dwight’s advice comes in when the counter hits 2:20.

As one of the lucky few on this sad planet who rank among the undead, I consider myself thankful for so many great things this world of clueless meandering flesh-bags has to offer — Slow-moving victims who always seem to trip and fall at the most inopportune times, meat-lockers at the morgue with cheap locks, royalty checks from the continual demand for my appearance in the hottest video games (thanks Left 4 Dead, CoD:W@W), and HD motherfcukin TV, my people. Are ya with me?!

Well, today I intend to curl my undead ass up with a nice glass of blended brains and give thanks for all these great things and more, all while watching endless hours of grue and gore on Monsters HD. They’ve got a marathon of me and my peeps running rampant on the silver screen going on all goddamn day, and I couldn’t be happier. Check out the skinny on this succulently screamin’ screen schedule right here.

Greetings Ghoul Gang,

Check out this putrid bowl of awesome. Word is that my very favorite freshman comic publisher, Red 5 Comics, are finally getting around to covering issues important to a ghast like myself — a six-issue series starring MY kind. Yes, that’s right, bitches. Zombies!

Kevin Grevioux (Underworld) is putting together the series, titled ZMD: Zombies of Mass Destruction, about zombie military weapons gone bad… real bad.

Check out the official info and images from their press release right here after the jump.

By guest writer Kent1985 of the Fused Film Blog

Greetings!

So, I am a massive Zombie movie fan. Anything zombie I am there. Unfortunately, I live in a crappy city (Memphis, TN) for that stuff because we are not in the center of the film industry out in LA or in a cool cultured town like New York City, so we always get cut out of the cool indie films that are released.

So today I ask if those of you in LA are going to check this zombie movie out called American Zombie that opens this weekend in Los Angeles? The movie’s official site has a coupon you can print out and bring to the theater to see the movie for only $6! Tonight’s 7:30 showing at the Laemmle Sunset 5 in West Hollywood will feature a post-viewing Q&A with the film’s writer/director Grace Lee and The Zombies.