Driven to Kill
Directed by Jeff King
Starring Steven Seagal
Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment
Release Date: May 19, 2009

If people in Hollywood were wise (and with rumors of a Guitar Hero movie on the horizon, there is no reason to believe they are), Steven Seagal‘s long, precipitous fall from grace would be utilized as a horror story for young actors: a hefty, pony-tailed boogeyman toiling under the beds of these hair-gelled sissies they call movie stars nowadays.

“See that, young Shia? That’s what happens when you act like a dick and defy men such as I!”

“Jesus! I’ll do whatever you say, Mister Katzenberg! I’ll do whatever you say! JUST DON’T PUT ME IN A MOVIE WITH DMX AND TOM ARNOLD! I’M TOO PRETTY TO DIE!”

Fifteen years after his prime, Seagal is still breaking wrists, throwing people out of windows, and running like a goddamned girl without any hint of irony or self-effacement. Only now it’s in Straight-To-DVD Land, where the least amount of collateral damage occurs.

In truth, I looked at the apparently thriving Seagal DVD market like I looked at the fur trade: I know it’s going on, and I know I vaguely don’t approve, but it doesn’t really have any bearing on my life. So let bygones be bygones for whomever is into that kinda thing.

“They took his daughter. So he’s taking them down.”

Haven’t any of these thuggish gangs of ne’er-do-wells learned from his previous movies? Simply put: Do Not Mess With Seagal! He will come for you. He will hit you with fists, feet, elbows, knees, pool cues, concrete blocks, and bullets… lots and lots of bullets… and feet.

And when Steven Seagal ask you to give away a few DVDs of his new movie Driven to Kill… you say YES! So, get your contest entry fingers ready to fly, my geeks, because we got ’em and we’re givin’ ’em.

I’ve got it on good authority that if you don’t enter Steven will be paying you a visit. So.. let’s go go go!

Three (3) winners will receive:

• One (1) copy of Driven to Kill on DVD

Check out the Steven Seagal checklist as well as a few video clips from Driven to Kill below after the jump.

Driven to Kill is available on blue Blu-Ray and DVD May 19th.

What do you have to do to get a chance to win? Glad you asked ’cause it’s really easy. Just make sure you’re a subscriber to our email digest, and then go ahead and fill out the handy dandy form below. Done.

Good luck!

TO ENTER: There’s just two simple steps: (1) Make sure you’re subscribed to the Geeks of Doom email digest. If you’re not then click here and sign up. (If you’re already a subscriber, then go right to the next step.) (2) Fill out the entry form here below and submit. (Form is here after the jump.)