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7 Unapologetic Rock Songs About Jailbait
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RunawaysIt was announced earlier this month that Twilight star Kristen Stewart would be starring as Joan Jett in The Runaways movie, which focuses on Jett’s teenage years as guitarist for the all-girl rock band The Runaways. While the band toured the world, the girls — all underage — were considered “jailbait,” a stigma which interfered with their attempts for mainstream success back in the 1970s.

But there is, of course, a double standard: The 1970s and 80s saw plenty of rock songs about the lust for jailbait, seemingly making it acceptable to crone about the desire for underage teens.

Here are 7 rock songs with unapologetic lyrics that try to justify getting it on with jailbait, complete with audio.

Motörhead – “Jailbait”

Jailbait Age: undetermined, but still tied to her mother’s apron strings.
Attempted Justification: She’s already backstage.
Questionable lyrics:
I don’t even dare to ask your age,
It’s enough to know you’re here backstage,
You’re Jailbait, and I just can’t wait,
Jailbait baby come on

According to Motörhead frontman Lemmy, if you’re backstage, then you’re fair game — no need for him to ask for identification.

From the album Ace Of Spades.

Winger – “Seventeen”

Jailbait Age: 17
Attempted Justification: She’s old enough for Kip Winger
Questionable lyrics:
She’s only seventeen,
daddy says she’s too young,
but she’s old enough for me

Don’t ask me why the 27-year-old Kip Winger couldn’t get a chick his own age. Seriously, he was a young guy, why did he have to get involved with a 17-year-old who’s father is clearly not down with this. When I hear this song, I always wait for the final verse to come where the father pulls out his shotgun and chases Kip Winger with his pants down around his ankles off his property and away from his daughter — sadly, that verse never comes.

From the album Winger.

KISS – “Christine Sixteen”

Jailbait Age: 16
Attempted Justification: Gene Simmons got to have her, can’t live without her
Questionable lyrics:
I don’t usually say things like this to girls your age,
but when I saw you coming out of the school that day,
that day I knew, I knew,
I’ve got to have you, I’ve got to have you

Singer/bassist Gene Simmons was 28 years old when he sang that he just had to have the 16-year-old Christine on this 1978 tune off KISS’s Love Gun. Apparently, the Demon thought his lustful professions were okay since, you know, he doesn’t usually say things like that to underage girls. Eventually, Simmons — who has a teenage daughter of his own now — said that he wasn’t singing from his own feelings, but that of a man in general who would act this way. Too bad it didn’t — and still doesn’t — come off that way.

From the album Love Gun.

Joan Jett and the Blackhearts – “I Love Rock N Roll”

Jailbait Age: 17
Attempted Justification: He was playing Joan Jett’s favorite song on the jukebox
Questionable Lyrics:
The beat was goin’ strong
Playin’ my favorite song
An’ I could tell it wouldn’t be long
Till he was with me, yeah me

Ah, sweet justice! Here the then-24-year-old Joan Jett finally gets to use jailbait to her advantage with this song, which skyrocketed her career, making her one of the best known and most successful female rock artists ever.

From the album I Love Rock N Roll.

Mötley Crüe – “All In The Name Of …”

Jailbait Age: 15
Attempted Justification: She’s already in a dirty, dirty magazine.
Questionable lyrics:
She’s only fifteen
She’s the reason, the reason that I can’t sleep
You say illegal
I say legal’s never been my scene

I was a little younger than 15 when this song — written by Crüe bassist Nikki Sixx — was released on the band’s Girls, Girls, Girls album. I’ll admit, after first hearing it, I totally thought it meant that I had a chance with Sixx. Nevermind that the girl in the song is basically an underage porn star, I totally skipped over that part (the mind thinks what it wants to think).

From the album Girls Girls Girls.

Ted Nugent – “Jailbait”

Jailbait Age: 13
Attempted Justification: He has her Mama’s permission
Questionable lyrics:
Jailbait you look so good to me,
jailbait won’t you set me free,
jailbait you look fine, fine, fine
and I know I’ve got to have you in a matter of time.

“Sad but true,” wildman Ted Nugent laments about the pretty youngster he has his sights set on. But in this tale, Nugent statutory rape is the least of his crimes, which include stealing cars and lady’s purses. In the end, as he’s getting hauled off in handcuffs, Nugent tries bargaining with the cop: “And I’ll share her with you.” Now that’s class.

From the album Intensities in 10 Cities.

Spinal Tap – “Tonight I’m Gonna Rock You Tonight”

Jailbait Age: undetermined
Attempted Justification: She’s lucky to even touch him cos he costs too much as it is.
Questionable lyrics:
You’re too young and I’m too well hung
Tonight I’m gonna rock you

The ultimate heavy metal parody band, Spinal Tap took the jailbait concept to the max to show its absurdity by making the object of their affections a four foot tall girl who still has her baby teeth.

From the album This Is Spinal Tap.

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