Lobster Johnson: Get the Lobster #3
Mike Mignola and John Arcudi
Art by Tonci Zonjic
Colors by Dave Stewart
Letters by Clem Robins
Cover by Tonci Zonjic
Dark Horse Comics
Release Date: April 2, 2014
Cover Price: $3.99

Nostalgia is a funny thing. It has a tendency to “color correct” our memories so that the way we remember things is pleasant or, at the very least, less painful than the actual events. I know guys who collect “antique comics” and have to listen to them ad nauseam describe how the storytelling is more pure and how the artwork, while less detailed, is more involved because the artists were “pioneers of the craft.” These assholes take Comic Hipsterness to a whole new level, and the crown prince of douche”¦ is Todd. Don’t get me wrong, Todd is a relatively nice guy until you sit down and let him speak and last weekend that’s exactly what happened.

So this is the story of how Lobster Johnson kicked the comic hipster’s ass.

Angel Falling
Written by Jeffrey Kaufman
Pencils by Kevin West
Inks by Mark McKenna, Bob Wiacek, Jack Purcell, and Kevin Yates
Colors by Tom Chu and Pete Pantazis
Letters by John Hunt
Cover by Jeffrey Kaufman, Dave Stewart, and Stan Johnson
Variant Cover by Billy Tucci and Felix Serrano
Zenescope Entertainment
Release Date: August 28, 2013
Cover Price: $9.99

How would you react if you woke up as a half-naked woman in an alley just as two guys are about to assault you? And when you suddenly find yourself beating them down with almost no effort, what then? Well, that’s exactly how Angel Falling starts off. Not knowing who she is or why she’s there, she begins to search for answers alongside a new-found companion who is more than he seems, too.

Calling himself 5, the young man calls her by the name Angel but refuses to speak more on the subject. Or any subject for that matter, he is extremely tight-lipped about everything. What he does show her, however, is that he has perfect reactions and is exceptionally skilled at hand-to-hand combat. We learn that he has eidetic kinesthesia, also known as perfect physical memory. This allows him to mimic and retain every physical action he sees. His statement of “failure means death” is repeated often throughout the comic.

Conan the Barbarian #24
Written by Brian Wood
Art by Riccardo Burchielli
Colors by David Stewart
Cover by Massimo Carnevale
Dark Horse Comics
Release Date: January 22, 2014
Cover Price: $3.50

Conan the Barbarian #24 is one of the most heartbreaking comics that I’ve ever read. But, I didn’t find that out until the very end. A great penultimate issue to this series.

Writer Brian Wood delivers an issue that is emotionally charged on two levels: one is heartbreak, the other is ferocity, and both come across equally, simultaneously, and spectacularly. On the surface, it’s Conan taking on a bunch of, literally, wild animals. And, on a deeper level, it’s Conan taking on the death of the love of his life, Belit. About halfway through the battle you realize why exactly Conan is fighting so hard.

Hellboy: The Midnight Circus
Hardcover | Kindle Edition
Written by Mike Mignola
Art by Duncan Fegredo
Colors by Dave Stewart
Cover by Mike Mignola
Dark Horse Comics
Release Date: October 23, 2013
Cover Price: $14.99

Something wicked this way comes, and it augers ill-portent for a young Hellboy in Hellboy: The Midnight Circus.

The previous story about the young Hellboy proved to be rather touching, and this one evokes a similar feeling. There’s something inherently sad about a child seeking to belong, to have a family, especially when it’s an orphaned child (which Hellboy is, demonic origin notwithstanding).

Without spoiling too much, we briefly revisit the story of Pinocchio, whose situation is made poetically similar to Hellboy’s, and from there, descend into a nightmarish, midnight circus, operated by characters who clearly have a strong knowledge of, and seemingly cryptic connections to, our young hero.

Was it all a dream? Was it real?

Shaolin Cowboy #1
Written and illustrated by Geof Darrow
Colors by Dave Stewart
Variant Cover by Walt Simonson
Pinups by Simon Roy, Aaron Conley, and Damon Gentry
Letters by Peter Doherty
Dark Horse Comics
Release Date: October 9, 2013
Cover Price: $3.99

This isn’t really a number one, but rather part of an ongoing tale, the last issue of Shaolin Cowboy having come out six years ago. With a schedule this spotty, I suppose it seemed smarter to renumber it as a first issue. Because of its sparse text, those picking it up for the first time won’t necessarily be lost, so it’s suitable as an introduction to the character/series.

As noted, the previous issue is six years old, so I can’t really remember the plot (such as it was), and can’t be bothered do dig through my short boxes. I can tell you that the art was insanely detailed and über-violent. And that’s why you buy this comic. For the inventive ways Geof Darrow figures out how to kill people, and for his exquisite renderings illustrating those depictions.