By Dr. Zaius
Wednesday, July 29th, 2015 at 3:00 pm
Real Fake History returns with its faux-documentary style to analyze the disastrous attempt to defeat the evil insects of Klendathu, in the totally hilarious and awesome action film Starship Troopers, directed by Paul “Showgirls” Verhoeven in 1997. Starship Troopers is fondly remembered because it fully embraced itself for what it was – a tribute to the B-monster movies of the 50s, with updated 90s special effects. It was totally off-the-wall insane, featuring gigantic alien bugs, thousands of war-crazy space soldiers, gory and graphic violence, and of course co-ed showers! It even has the most B-movie cast in B-movie history featuring Casper Van Dien, Jake Busey, and the great Michael Ironside.
Watch the Real Fake History video below.
We open with the quote by Ironside’s character, the fearless Lt. Jean Rasczak: “I have only one rule… Everybody fights, no one quits… If you don’t do your job, I’ll kill you myself.” Truly, next to Patton, that’s probably the best military speech you’ll hear. The problem though, was the planning of the battle. The roughnecks were trained to be overconfident, and in the training simulations, were shooting at human targets. The problem? They were actually going to be fighting oversized alien insects! In a recording to his girlfriend, a former soldier describes his concerns, while demonstrating his overzealousness and confidence. He is critical of the use of live ammo during training, which resulted in the accidental death of a recruit. But at least there are those co-ed showers!
An expert chimes in with more critiques of the training regimen. “Yes it is hard to focus on training when you have a boner. All these soldiers could think about was sex. Sex and war do not mix.” Well, they did in Starship Troopers, and come on! When your director helmed both Basic Instinct AND Showgirls, you know what you’re gonna get. The soldier’s message home riddled with details of the bloody gore, are cut off by… MORE SHOWERS!
Real Fake History videos are done by Machinima, which has over 12.5 million YouTube subscribers. The RFT videos debut every Tuesday. Starship Troopers is available on Netflix DVD, and Amazon Instant Video for a $2.99 rental, and is truly a must-watch if you never saw it.
The Federation’s assault on the Arachnid planet Klendaathu was a disaster that cost the lives of 308,563 human troops. When you practice on human targets and take hot co-ed showers every day, how can you be good at killing bugs?
Starship Troopers: Disaster on Klendathu – Real Fake History